Can i not drive my cunt home
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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