I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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