I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
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