I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
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