let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I would ride that face into the sunset
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
