is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Betty ford says i'm here all night
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize