??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize