great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
