i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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