I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
