I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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