Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
