are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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