I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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