Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
