Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I will be naked everywhere
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
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