No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
