do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
