brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
