so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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