he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
