I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
