Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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