Do you still have your period?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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