im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
