Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Randomize