Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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