just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
