Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Drunk is a universal language darling
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
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