best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
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his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
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I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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