Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
