Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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