Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
