we have pet lesbian snakes
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
