party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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