Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
