Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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