Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize
