I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
