i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
