Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize