The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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