He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
