Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
