Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
