Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
