got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize