i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack