So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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