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I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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