Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
